He's Home!!

Today has been a wonderful day!  It started very early with me getting up at 5am, but it was worth it very much!!  I got to the Hendrickson's home, and we loaded up to head to Dallas.  Todd was coming home today from serving two years in Chile, and I was not going to miss seeing him!!!

It was absolutely amazing seeing him, and I cried.  I was the first person to see him, and they all said I was jumping straight up and down like their dog Lilly.  LOL!  I didn't care one bit as I just know I saw him, and was so excited!

Todd is like a little brother, best friend, guy I've known for years.  He is absolutely amazing, and it was just fun to be with him all day.  I have missed him so much, and he is now home!  It's going to be different since I am married now as we won't get to hang out like we used to or just talk forever.  But he's home, and that's all that matters!!!

So Many Thoughts

It's 12:38am, and I am still up.  I really don't know why as I worked a busy day today, yesterday, the day before, and the day before, and well, the day before.  However, I am still up.  The brain keeps going, and I'm just trying to find out where to place it all.

1) I miss dancing so much!  Once I get some money, I'm thinking I'm going to check out The Bar Method.  It would bring back some ballet in my life, and maybe help me feel a little better about myself.  I do not like how my body is right now, and I know, I just have to get out there and do something.  But that's hard to do alone - when you aren't really sure what you need to do.

2) Oh the self image.  Okay, I know it's something I probably talk about a lot, but it effects me just that much.  I don't like my hair, my skin color, or my weight.  I've never liked the proportions of my body, but that's a little better.  I paid to fix what I couldn't stand.  Hey - it works!

3) Work has become my life!  I think about it all the time, and I just hope that I can be the best manager possible.  I hope that I can help my employees out to grow and gain skills.  Don't ever go from a boring desk job to an on your feet all day, every day job.  It certainly gets to you, but I'm loving it!  I love working for maurices!  It's an amazing company, and I hope to be there till I just can't go anymore.

4) So I want my own family - my own children; however, I don't want to give up work.  Well, I don't plan on it.  I will be that mom who puts her child in daycare at a very early age.  I grew up in daycare, and I turned out perfectly fine.  My children will have 6-12 weeks of me, and then it's time to get back to work.  But then it just makes me wonder... do I even need to have children?  I don't want to raise children in this area anyways, and then I won't even be around.  For some that's such an easy answer, but for me, I really am not sure.  I guess if/when that time comes, I'll figure something out.  I mean, I do work for an amazing company that wants you to have family time!  And of course, I think about getting pregnant and having the worst issues with gaining weight.  UGH!

See... I told you my brain was running.

5) Church!  That will probably always be a battle, and everyone will have their opinions about it.  To some it's so easy, and to others, it just doesn't make sense.  I haven't been for a month for one reason or another, and won't be there for another two weeks.  Honestly, I don't miss it.  I guess I probably should, but I never really enjoyed going so why would I miss it.  Right now, I couldn't tell you where I wanted to be or what I wanted in this area.  I thought I knew, but I must not have.  It really shouldn't be this hard, and it shouldn't split people, families apart!  And besides, I can promise you that the best people I know are not LDS.  Not that I don't know some great people who are, but really, the best people I know are not LDS or at least not active.

Just a lot to think about, and I'm sure there's so much more.  Like why I had a dream that I was running away from some creeps trying to I guess kill me with someone else and my dog Lexie.  Yea, that was weird!

UTAH!

The Utah trip was a great trip!  It's going to be so weird going back to work tomorrow, but I have enjoyed having a break.  We had a lot of fun with each other, and just enjoying the beautiful weather.  Oh, I would love to be back there!!

I'm sad that I didn't get to see everyone, but I know I'll get back!  There's no doubt about it!

One last exciting thing... tomorrow is my first day as STORE MANAGER!!  I'm so excited to be going back to maurices!!  It's going to be great!!!

The Week that Almost Took My Trip

I tend to stress out about money, and when things happen unexpectedly, I get even more stressed.  This week brought that on greatly along with making me wonder if I was going to get my trip to Utah or not.  Now if you have followed anything I've shared, I miss Utah!!  I want to get back so badly!

Well, how could this week be so bad that it would cause me to stress out and almost lose my trip to Utah with the husband - I will tell you.

Sunday was the start of it all.  The internet just cut off completely and then came back on.  Okay, that can happen so no big deal, but then all the power within the house went off.  It was off for about a minute or so before it came back on.  This is just at our house.  It did it again later on.  Oh so frustrating!!

Monday night, the power went off and came back on again.  UGH! 

Wednesday is when it really went down hill... the power went out and wasn't coming back on.  There was nothing coming through except just a little juice as the fan might run some, but everything else is dim or dead.  It was a really odd situation.  So, we stay at Brandon's parents.

Thursday they are supposed to get it all fixed... we find out that it was a connecting piece to the meter that burned up - literally.  After lots of frustrating conversations, it wasn't going to be completed by the night.  The meter wasn't going to be put back on till the next day at some point.  Actually, I was told 3-5 business days.  :-/  Brandon's parents house again.

Friday morning I come by to check up on Squeaker, and the Oncor guy is here!!  We have power again!!  However, it went downhill at lunch time... the a/c is broke!!  Brandon's parents again.  It's looking like we won't have a/c till Monday... maybe.

It's Saturday, and Terry (Brandon's dad) calls his HVAC guy.  Oh this was a great thing!  11:30pm I was able to pack up and come home.  It's cooling down as I type this, and although I have two bills coming my way - UGH! - it isn't going to cost an arm and a leg!!

Turned out that someone stepped on the copper wiring that broke and caused all the freon to spill out.

Two weeks till Utah!!

Stuck

Do you ever just feel.... stuck?!  Stuck in a town or a situation.  Stuck in a job or relationship.  Stuck in a way of life that doesn't seem to fit you or maybe you don't fit.

Now, I'm not saying that I'm stuck in a relationship because I love my husband.  We are still growing, but it's going forward which is so comforting.  I tend to get a little selfish or jealous with/about him as I just don't want to share.  It really would be okay if he was with me all the time after and before work.  But maybe I would think differently if that was the case.  hehe

However, I do feel stuck!  I feel stuck in Nacogdoches (which is great for some, but not for me).  I feel stuck in a job that honestly, I can't stand one bit (that's a totally different story!).  I feel stuck trying to be someone that I'm not 100% sure if it's me.  Being me should be the one thing that I am good at being!

How do you get unstuck?  I can apply for jobs, but then I just sit and wait.  I'm trying to be patient, but I'm not a very patient person when I'm needing to find some kind of happiness.  Leaving Nacogdoches isn't in the pictures for a few years for different reasons, but if I get a new job and the one I want, it wouldn't be too bad.  I could make Nacogdoches work for a bit longer.  And as for me personally... I just really don't know.  That's been an on-going battle for some time.

Stuck is how I feel, and I'm ready to get some Goof Off to get rid of all the stickiness that has kept me stuck!!

To Go Back

Do you ever think back over your life, and think to yourself, I would love to go back to ______ time?  I usually don't, but there are a few moments that I wouldn't mind going back to at all.

1) Living in Utah.  I miss those 2 1/2 years.  They weren't the easiest, but there are so many great memories that I have.  There were so many wonderful moments; so many growing moments.

2) EFY San Antonio 1 -- Become Strong!!  Such an amazing group!  They made me want to be better, and honestly, they still do!!

3) EFY San Antonio 3 -- Full of Love!!  By now I had developed a few great friendships and just enjoyed growing with my group.  They were wonderful!  I really did and do love working with the youth!

Yes, I love my life, and things really are just getting better and better.  Things are improving, and I know that there is so much happiness and joy in my future.  But those three things just mean so much to me, and are the memories I never want to lose.  They were happy!  They were full of peace!  They were ME!

Wire Jewelry!

We are all looking for new things that are cute, fun, and special.  I have just the thing for you!

My really good friend, Laure Dowling, has started creating cute, fun, and special items made out of wire.  Check out her store on Etsy.  More will come if she gets the business, and I can tell you this, I am trying to figure out what I want without spending too much!!  :)  I think you'll all love them!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/LaleePops82